Sunday, July 15, 2007

Life, lifelines?

I had planned to write about my FOs and post pictures from my blanket and the successful elongation of my old turquoise jumper (in order to fit today's style) when I read the post about lifeline in the concert's blog about the attempted suicide of U.S. tenor Jerry Hadley. After the first shock of reading this, I started thinking about the singing profession life in- and outside of it.
What happens if your life doesn't take the turn that you wanted it to? How desperate must one be to end one's life rather than being able to face the problems? I can't say why Mr. Hadley wanted his to end. I know I considered such a step when my life had been cut down to wondering whether I would be able to make it from my bed to the bathroom. During that time the German opera magazine Das Opernglas was my only contact with the singing world, or more the world outside of my room, and I read about his debut in Hamburg. I don't know the pains and worries that finally led to this attempted suicide. However, it seems that financial worries and a declining carreer were contributing factors.
Mr. Hadley is unfortunately not alone with these pressing worries. I can think of lots of other singers who after performing in major houses, winning Emmys, doing recordings - then disappeared. I can name several young singers who were supposed to be THE new star 5 years ago and now noone hears from them anymore. What happened? What shocks me is the fact that we all seem to be disposable, easy to replace - there doesn't seem to be much loyalty around.
It brings home how blessed I have been to have a lifeline. Lifelines in my experience are not huge big cords - more fine threads. In my case my family who was always there for me, my cousin C, and my good friend G. I know I can call them anytime if I'm sad or happy. And it is because of those lovely people that I'm here.

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